Day 62 & 61. I have chosen to live intentionally toward the goals, dreams and desires God has placed on my heart for the last 90 days of this year, pressing past fear, excuses and discomfort toward fullness of life as we countdown to 2020. Day 62 &61: practicing presence.
“Mom, I don’t understand. No one at school is excited for the snow like I am! You know some of my classmates don’t even want it to snow right now?!” My son’s words, disillusionment and uncontainable giddiness welcomed Halloween 2019. By his 2:00pm Halloween parade, Isaiah was in a state of utter delight as a full on Chicago winter descended.
“Stay within the blue line!” The gym teacher shouted in a stern voice as I took in the acrid smell of gym class and school lunch. We were lined up shoulder to shoulder, cameras out, snowy wet shoes squeaking on the gym floor, engaging in awkward small talk. Then the parade began. It took 5 minutes for the children to share their costumes. I saw my son for 5 seconds. I couldn’t even snap a good picture before we were ushered out of the building and back into the snow.
Did I really just drive 45 minutes on slippery roads with limited visibility and walk a quarter of a mile in the snow to be present for my son for the five seconds? Yes, yes I did, and my guess is you did too or at least you tried to, because that’s what parents do. We go to Halloween parades, recorder concerts and first year orchestra concerts to invest in these little humans and make sure they know they are not alone in the world. During flu season we buy copious amounts of Jello, make vats of chicken soup and hold them close all night if need be. We navigate broken hearts, racism, sexism and injustice with them because we love them, and we want to equip them. In a world that is hard, we foster their friendships. We say yes to sleepovers, caffeine and snacks when we may not feel like it because we know the importance of those late nights with friends. We don’t do it perfectly, but we show up as best as we can, as often as we can, and we do it again and again to help them know they are loved and the things they love matter to us too. Then, when they are tired, we hold space.
That is what we did today as they recovered—we held space together. We hugged. We cuddled. We laughed. We watched movies. We rested. We were present to one another. We sat together without words, our hearts full from Halloween. We remembered all that happened yesterday, and celebrated the snow, agreeing we are all longing for the joy and hope of Christmas a little earlier this year and we are all longing for more time together.
ACTION STEPS: My parenting is far from perfect, but as I delight in my children, I am always struck by the truth that God loves us even more than the greatest love we have ever felt for another human. Take that in for a moment. The greatest, deepest love you have ever felt for another human, God loves you even more. Reflect as you read:
“For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
Romans 8:38-39
Do you believe this right now? That nothing, absolutely nothing, can separate you from God’s love? In the darkest, most painful and broken areas of your life right now, God is there with you, loving you and advocating on your behalf? Do you know you are loved by God exactly how and where you are today? Reflect and receive this truth, and next time you are with someone you love dearly, may you remember how much more God loves you, and lean into this truth: You. Are. Loved.
Since I failed to get any Halloween pics this year, I share this pic from last week. Isaiah was eager to pose for an early Christmas pic, and this was before snow. Love my babies.